Posts

Sharing Old Thoughts | A Reflection From 2016

I wrote something to myself last April, and well, it seems I've been having existential questions for at least that long.
April 10, 2016: It’s weird to think I’m ‘starting over’ before I’ve even hit my 20s, but I am.
It’s not exactly the major changes which define this process – but gradually shifting my mindset in hope that the last year of tumultuous relationships won’t repeat itself, at least not in the same way. Existing and going through the motions is not a way to live, and I’ve been told that ever since I hit high school – but when I sank low enough, reasoning wasn’t enough. I was fighting to pretend to be happy and optimistic about my future, when I was really falling to pieces inside. I defined myself by my grades and my refusal to open up, and as someone who rarely lets the truth spill from her, pretending to be someone I’m not ended up doing a lot more harm than good.
When I lost someone close to me this year, I ended up in a church saying goodbye and realized the most im…

On Speaking vs. Writing | A Personal Post

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I'm alive and blogging!

I chose the opposite forum I usually would to share why I write. Why? Because I need to learn how to speak too.

Emily

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On Influences & Gravitational Pull || A Reflective Post

Something I've been thinking about recently is the concept of what it really means when people say 'opposites attract'. Do they mean it at a superficial level, or do people instantly gravitate towards people unlike themselves? Is it even true, or does it only apply to certain types of people? And, if it is true - do those people influence the person you become? I've talked a lot about my internalised battles associated with whether I want to be settled and somewhere stable, or be rootless enough to be able to jet off in an instant. (Full Disclosure: I want both of those things.) I wonder why sometimes I'm so curious to learn about the world, and others - I literally just want to do enough to pass the course and shed that knowledge the second it's over. I feel like I am my own miniature version of contradictions, that it's impossible to even fathom the idea that I even have an 'opposite' or 'similar' person to gravitate towards. But, in th…

On Gratitude, Fate & The People You Meet || A Personal Post

“I want to be happy, and I want to control my fate.”
This is the quote from ‘The Good Wife’ which I’ve talked about over and over, in a variety of contexts.
I generally believe that our futures can be altered by the decisions we make, and that ‘going with the flow’ isn’t necessarily an indication that things are always going to end up the same way regardless of your decisions – instead, it is an active choice to let instincts drive decision-making and assume that the path you’ve chosen just is. I’m an active non-fan of the ‘full-circle’ stories in television because it always catalyses a new existential crisis within me – forcing me, once again, to reassess the power of external factors on the life we lead, and whether any of that control is truly ours to harness.
But this notion of gratitude and exposing myself to individuals who fundamentally believe in a world I don’t has encouraged me to readjust my opinions, and address some of my greatest subconscious biases.
Example: I’m an atheist…

The Most Heartbreaking 'Full Circle' || Gilmore Girls Revival

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Time has been a great friend to 'Gilmore Girls: A Year In The Life'. While I won't say I've fallen in love with the new episodes, and I will never backtrack on my criticisms of issues with characterisations, casting, poor joke selection and general problems with adapting with a new age valuing intersectionality and diversity as the new norms - there were clear moments of strong writing.

The 'full circle' discussion has drawn varied opinions of the thousands (if not millions) of viewers - especially as the conversation evolved into, "Which boyfriend is Rory's Luke?" 

360 minutes of new footage seemed to whittle down - as the final four words took on a life of its own, embodying the 'full circle' which has defined our conversations. But, being me - I want to talk about the other full circle. I've made my peace with Rory's pregnancy and I've made my peace with the idea that there will be no more Gilmore Girls (even if I end up being…

Overcoming My Fears Through Passion || A Personal Post

If you've followed me for awhile, you'll have read a little something I wrote just before 'The Good Wife' ended last spring. (Guys, it's been 11 months since TGW ended...)
I mentioned that I would be indebted to 'The Good Wife' for drawing me into its universe, making me feel so passionately about its characters, their actions and the world they developed from their inspiration, the Elliot Spitzer press conference. I said I would love the show for fuelling me with passion and so many opinions that my fears about opening up and expressing myself fell to the wayside. My need to reveal my interests, what excited and disappointed me forced me out of my shell.
For the first 15 years of my life (didn't get opinionated till Season 4-5 of the show), I had been the quiet one. I hated drawing attention to myself - and had built my online persona to relieve tension. 
When the show started to make me think, however, I needed to use my voice. I wanted to voice my o…

'Get To Know Me' Tag || 21 Questions

So, back again with another post! I have a few post ideas - but I'm having trouble articulating my perspective so I thought it was time to relax and do the 'Get To Know Me' tag.

Are you ready?! (Probably, since most of you are from my Instagram and I'm notorious for lengthy captions. Yeah, I'm gonna try and lengthen the answers.)

1. Are you named after anyone? Nope! My name was the most popular name in 1997, and that's how I got it. (I would've been named David if I was a boy.)

2. When was the last time you cried? God, I've done similar tags and usually the answer would be 'last week' but honestly, I remember crying in July last year & that's about it. I'm sure I've cried since; they just don't stand out.

3. Do you have kids? No.

4. If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? Yes, but I'm not always good company all the time so only sometimes?

5. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yeah. Need to tone it down and use it…